“You should never underestimate the sleeping wolf. The sleeping wolf is still the wolf. It’s going to catch you by surprise any single time”
~ Redva Kaurvaki
Well, this is not my favorite way telling story for Princess Kaurvaki. If you’re quote favorite or fans of my self improvement’s posts, it would be better to leave this post alone. Seriously, this is not for you, my lovely readers….
I don’t like people to underestimate me. I know, I can’t manipulate this moment in my life, but sorry, it’s really not easy to leave this feeling go. I would rather process this toxic away than being hospitalized. This is about her again and again. Normally, this should not about her. Unfortunately, yes, it’s about her –it starts making you confused now, right?.
She can be very good and warm person. But for me, she become monster too often and pose everything too hard. Since I was kids, she like to scream and shout to me. She often hurt my pride and hurt my ego.
Few years later, she did it again to me, which I never hope to be happened ever again. She hits me once again with insulting words and it hurts me even worse. I’ve tried to come back for her and stand behind her, but she seems not able to see all these effort I’ve done to her. I find it useless and feeling broken all over again. I can’t blame her for expecting too much to have her one standing behind to support. I know, most people who sit in the bottom of the wheel of their life will receive more jibe), but I can’t accept her to let me down again. Especially, because I thought she should be the one of my biggest supporter.
I always believe that whoever they are or I am, we should respect each other. She likes me or not, it’s not a matter and not my business either. But it seems weird to me watching her showing her degradation. Tolerance is expensive indeed. She doesn’t have to pretending smile in front of me though. Respect is not that hard actually for any educated or religious person.
I promise my self to make her watching me someday. She will find me in better situation and better joy with more smile and laughter. She always doubt me and think me worse. Yes, I accept that and I don’t want to revoke soon. I know there is time for everything. I’ll prove her that I can lift myself higher. That time would definitely come.
( This story is coming from one of my close friends. She told me in fire how somebody supposed to be her supporter hurting her badly. I wrote what she feels exactly like it is )